Saturday, 26 November 2011
DVD review: The Ninja Mission (1984)
The plot here, which takes place during the cold war, is that the soviet nuclear scientist Markov (Curt Broberg) wants to defect to Sweden. But his plans are ruined by the KGB who kidnaps him and tell him that he has arrived in Sweden. This trickery is their way of seeing to that Markov continues his work in nuclear physics that will revolutionize the energy supply for the whole planet. As a backup, KGB kidnaps Markov's estranged daughter Nadia. The CIA however is bent on getting Markov to the west and send their team of ninjas led by Mason (Krzysztof Kolberger) and Hansen (Bo F. Munthe) to liberate him.
The Ninja Mission is a swedish action flick directed by the profilic Mats Helge Olsson, it isn´t very well made or directed. For a ninja film there is a strange lack of of martial arts and the few fight scenes are badly choreographed. The ninjas soon forget their swords and throwing stars and instead use sub machineguns with deadly effect as they take on the soviet army with a seemingly endless supply of ammunition. We get several slow motion shoot outs with lots of people being riddled with big gory squibs but that´s not all, the ninjas have a special weapon that fires poison darts which are used to gruesome effect against people's heads and abdomens (they explode).
The acting is hilarously bad, the choice of having swedish actors speaking english is a really bad move and the cause for unintentional humour. Sirka Sander who plays the professor assistant Natassia is possibly one of the worst actresses I´ve seen. The pacing is good, but beware that the major actionscenes take place in the beginning and towards the end and between these the film is a bit boring...
There is uncut DVD releases of The Ninja Mission in Germany and Sweden.
Rating: 3½ out of 7. There is really only one good reason to watch this movie and that is for the incredibly violent actionscenes.